Speaking about the resurrection that will freely come to all, Alma revealed, “The soul shall be restored to the body, and the body to the soul; yea, and every limb and joint shall be restored to its body; yea, even a hair of the head shall not be lost; but all things shall be restored to their proper and perfect frame.” As wonderful as it sounds, I have a small problem with the resurrection: I don’t want my hair back.
For over twenty years I tried to find a hair style that suited me. And for over twenty years, nothing worked. When I was young my mom thought the bowl cut was a good idea—I was just too young to protest. The slicked-over side-part wasn’t much of an improvement, either. Buzz cuts sometimes looked okay, but they made my ears look too big. Spiked hair, the staple of 90’s fashion, was terrible. I tried spiking the hair only in the front, but, unfortunately, because my hair line was already receding, that, too, was a disaster; I didn’t have much of a front to spike. My senior year in high school, I reverted back to the side-part, without the greasy gobs of gel, of course, for a natural, wavy look. I liked it but my friends made fun of me. My hair during my mission was a catastrophe. In college I cut my hair short, about an 1/8 of an inch long, and I was mostly satisfied. On a dare, I used a razor to shave my head completely. My naked cranium looked comical: my face was tan while my scalp white, a natural colorless helmet. But a few days in the sun solved that. Since then, I’ve always shaved my head. Once, when I wanted to see what I looked like with hair again, I let my locks grow out a quarter-inch; but my boss, who otherwise never spoke to me, told me it added five years to my face and to shave it before work the next day. Who would have guessed that when a balding man shaves his head, he looks better—and, believe it or not, less bald? Oh, the ironies of life.
So when that blessed morning comes, when every limb and joint will be restored to my body and every hair restored to my head, I will decline the latter. I’ll say, “Jesus, you can keep my hair—I look better without it.”
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I agree.
ReplyDeleteI liked your hair senior year. Sometimes I feel the same way, except I don't think bald is an option for me :)
ReplyDeletethat is so funny Blake :) I love your posts, they are always so witty and fun to read. My husband is going bald too, and it makes me feel better that people still look good bald, and sometimes like the way they look better. Hopefully, my husband won't be to depressed when he's lost all of his hair too!
ReplyDeleteHahaha! I bet there are some other bald men out there who would definitely agree with you..like Bruce Willis and Vin Diesel and Samuel L Jackson. I don't think we'll be able to recognize them in heaven WITH hair!
ReplyDeleteSince I'm the mother of three sons (and two sons-in-law) who are losing their hair, I have to say that I agree. Some people just look better without hair. I don't know about resurrection day, though. For those who don't look better--but it's what they have to live with--we might all be happy.
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